Today~Yesterday~Tomorrow
I'm curious about something. There are a few old adieu keepsakes to be assigned to just about anything someone says or does that refers to past. To name a few,
"You can't live in the past if you wish to live for the future" ~ "The past should stay where the name says, in the past" ~ "Dreams are tomorrow, nightmares are yesterday" ~ "You'll back yourself off a cliff if your always looking backwards" ~
Blah Blah Blah says the pessimist
Rah Rah Rah says the opptimist
Etc., etc. Ok, so maybe I made a few of those up on my own accord, but I'm certain, they've all been said one way or another, at some point in time, by someone.
However, on the flip side of that perspective. It can be said that a persons past is what shapes their today, tomorrow. The choices made yesterday, or last year can have a direct effect on a persons specific now. I think thats a pretty fair assessment and hard to deny.
So, yesterday is my past, and last week is my history and the month before is a piece of my timeline that only I can claim. Whether I choose to ignore what happened yesterday, or 5 months ago, it IS a permanent fixture in my overall world. I'm certain these pieces are important enough to examine, to find peace with, learn from and discover possible revelations that will help me with my tomorrow and next week, next month and year. If not, then what the hell was the point?
Finding the happy medium between what is done, and what is to come and what is happening right now is my constant mental struggle. It's possible if I didn't care what I did, who I did it to, be it myself, or those I love, I probably wouldn't weigh the ties between yesterday and tomorrow as often as I do.
I'm just wondering, does anyone really adhere to those above quotes? Does anyone really walk the walk, talk the talk and tie out each day without a glance backwards to what they did?
I understand it sounds strong and encouraging to say to someone," Don't spend to much time looking at the past, you can't change it, but you can change your future if you choose." Solid advice for just about any situation. I get it, I got it. Really, check the box, I'm good there.
There's just something deeper out there, in here, hovering in a gray zone I can't quite put a finger on. Be it regret, be it guilt, barely touching the hem of truth, I know there is something beyond cliched quotes and sentimental notions that I'm missing.
It could be that I want something I can have, right now, if I made the right choices for once. It could be that I stand hand in hand with irrational instead of moving out of the shadows. The haunting in my heart and the daunting task of masking it each and every day is certainly taking it's toll. A past can masquerade as a melancholy tone or an enduring tribute. I can claim both sides of that coin, and know whether I choose to ignore my past or nurture it, it's still a part of me, my timeline, my universe.
A tomorrow is full of chances and possibilities, and today my reality.
And the glorious past, no longer a choice, but still there, whispering in my ear to remember, learn my lessons, reminding me where I've come from and that nothing was done in vain, nothing falls into a void of forgotten memories.
Then again, I could be so completely blinded by my past that my perspective is completely out of whack. Hence, my highlighted gray zone of wonderment. This might be a good time to mention, I do not stay in bed all day holding my knees against my chest rocking back and forth consumed with my consequences, good and bad, of my past. I do conduct myself in a regular everyday capacity. I know, don't be too shocked by that revelation ::Grin::
My musings about my yesterday, a month ago, 7 years ago, is confined within myself. The beautiful moments I embrace when I need a smile. The shadows of my choices, the what could have been and the moments that defined my now. The voices of wisdom, and the spiteful chatter of mistakes.
It's occurred to me, that maybe I resist the above quotes because I need, desire, and tenaciously hold on to the notion the my past is important, is significant and to let it all go to the wayside without a glance, would seem so..... wasteful.
Tuesday, February 28, 2006
Waste Not, Want Not
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
22 comments:
And you would be correct in that. I can safely say, to this point, I have only one regret...and it happened because of my numbed choice...which was still my choice. I love where I am right now in life. Would I be happier to have gotten here via a gentler path? I would be a thief and a liar, if I said no. I am who/what I am today for no other reason than my past. Well done...very well done. You're writing/introspection is AMAZING. ;) C. http://journals.aol.com/gdireneoe/thedailies
Some of the things that make up are pasts, are a part of who we are. Then we apply what we learned. So in some cases we have to look back. I refuse to be like "him".
How can we learn from the past if we don't visit it from time to time? History, be it last week or years ago, is essential to how we appreciate what the future brings. You just can't have one without the other. Dwelling and drowning in all that was may have been what sparked someone to make those poetic sayings.
History, lessons and memory lane would be sadly missed if we were to ignore them!
Have a good day and reminisce
Tammy
http://LifeLiveItOrMissOut.blogspot.com
What is it they say, "Those who do not learn from their past are doomed to repeat it". I believe that. I try to look at where I have been, learn from it and try to repeat the good stuff while avoiding the bad.
Wonderful writing, as always. I love coming here! I may not always know what causes you to write what you do, but your lyrical use of words always makes me think even as I enjoy them.
http://journals.aol.com/astaryth/AdventuresofanEclecticMind
http://adventuresofaneclecticmind.blogspot.com/
I am of two minds on this topic.
The past and the future do not exist except in thought and memory. The only real thing, is right now. Time is an allusion that we have created to explain our constantancy, our continued natures, and the changes that happen to us and the environment.
That being said, I find it easy to live now, to live in the moment as Kerouac, or Wordsworth, or even Virngina Woolf attempted. I also, however, admit to the existence of memory and thought, which can impact our feelings in the now. I believe that our feelings and thoughts in the now can manipulate, alter our thoughts of the past so that we can have the present we wish and hope for.
Ex: Behavioral Modification for someone who has been through a PTSD episode. We can work on our memories to impact our present. That, i think, is the extent to which we should dwell in that world.
Charley
http://journals.aol.com/CDittric77/Courage
Well said, Charley.
I'm also of two minds. On the one hand, since the past has happened, constantly dwelling on my choices is maddening and disheartening, because of everything that is going on in my life right now. On the other hand, those bad choices that I've made have had some beautiful consequences.
And the future, we can dream dream dream all we want, but we have to sometimes make immediate choices which we have no idea of the consequences. Those choices might cause us immediate unhappiness, but could lead to larger good things in the future. Who can tell.
http://redsneakz.blogspot.com
Charley's comment brings up another point. If the past exists only in our memories-and it does-exactly how accurate are they? Studies show us that our memories are continuously being rewritten by our brains to the point that our recollections of things that happened as recently as several months ago can diverge fairly significantly from what actually happened. Don't dwell in the past, because you invented it anyway.
-Paul
http://journals.aol.ca/plittle/AuroraWalkingVacation/
I look at it this way. Say you hurt yoursefl and are bleeding. Do you wonder what did it or do you treat yourself? You can look at what caused later when there is time so that you lower the chances it doesn't happen again. I like staying in the present since it is the best thing I can do for the future. ~ Mike
Hi there, I was just journal-surfing and came across yours. I love the way you write, it's very refined and eloquent. I really enjoyed visiting! :-)
~ Susan
http://journals.aol.com/njmom72/InMyLife
Just checking up on you, since you are good at coming by and checking up on me. :)
Take Care!!
Amanda :)
http://journals.aol.com/trickeytricky/CountryMyKindaLivin
There's nothing wrong with remembering the past. Sometimes it is required of us to spend time there so that when we have great difficulties in the present, it's the past that can open our eyes to what can be in the future. For me, it was when my dad was dying. Watching his unresponsive body continue to function as cancer ran rampant throughout his body, he was still alive on my birthday. I leaned over and whispered to him "hey dad, thanks for sticking around for my birthday". His eyes opened for three seconds as he looked at me and smiled. He lapsed back into a state of unresponsiveness and peacefully passed away the next day. I treasure those three seconds as though they were gold. I know that I must continue to live and look forward to the future. But under NO circumstances am I going to EVER forget that moment with my father. It's in the past... absolutely! but I can draw upon that past for inspiration and I especially now that I've got a lot of things to go through... I think back to how my dad handled situations. And I hope to try and emulate that in some way. That's how I incorporate the past into the present. And still look forward to the future...
http://journals.aol.com/alohamik/DiaryofRock-n-RollMen/
http://alohamik.blogspot.com/
You have a beautiful mind, Rebecca.
Your quotes made me think of something that Oddball (Donald Sutherland's character) said in the movie Kelly's Heros when explaining why they reversed their tank's transmissions:
These tanks are faster than any other tanks
in Europe. Forwards or backwards.
We like to feel that we can get out
of trouble quicker than we got into it.
Chris
Most recent entry was 2/28/06
http://inanethoughtsandinsaneramblings.blogspot.com/
Never forget your past, but at the same time do not hang onto it as if it were a life raft. If you do you will never move forward in your life experiences. I've always looked at the future with the feeling of "possibilities". after all, given that life can be fleeting at times...all we have is the moment. So please enjoy all your moments....Sandi
I am a strong believer in honoring your past. I have some rather horrible things in my past... an abusive relationship that came near to killing me being the top... and as much as I wish it hadnt happened, as much as I would fight to keep it from ever happening again, the lessons I learned from that time, and yes, the hardships I learned to overcome...have made me the person I am now.....and I am pretty fond of that person. I would be someone compeletly different if I hadnt gone through what I did. Yes, you have to learn from the past, yes, you have to move on past it, but you can't erase it...shouldn't want to erase it. I also know for a fact that if it hadn't been for that horrible time, I will still be drudging on in the ho-hum life I was living beforehand. It is due to the change in situation, circumstance and self caused by that abuse that led me to chase and catch a dream I had abandoned years before.
Jessica
http://jessicawaters.com/QuickSilverDreams
I think our past is just like the rest of the world...we can repeat mistakes if we do not learn from them...and help others with the knowledge we gain when we conquer those mistakes. The past is a touchy subject for me...yep I am "one of those put in the closet and try to keep hid ppl" sometimes it hurts too much...then again some of the sweetest things comes back and makes me smile...so I guess I am lost on the subject...lol all that for that....lol Wonderful entry...I often chatter in my journal without ever putting my whole heart into it. I laugh when I'm scared and talk way too much. So I enjoy your journal..it makes me slow down, and think...scary, but it happens. Take care
Dwana
so true
Have you ever picked up a history book in school, or in the library? Have you read about the way the world and society was shaped? Have you studied what was done then that led us as a nation, and a species, to where we are now? Yeah, me too... and I got a C for it in high school. I suck at history.
But.... we each have our own little history, instances which eventually brought us to where we are today and there fore just as important on an individual level. Even the slightest action played some part in the consequences of our direction which is ever changing. I will even go so far as to point out that we in turn affect other people's past AND future through our actions.
'That was then, this is now', that was my favorite quote to wave in my parents face. They fell for it. I never will, because now I believe that THEN is what has brought us to NOW and therefore just as important. Does that make sence?
Long comment short... (oops, it may be too late for that), the past is just as relevant as the future, but ultimately it is the present that you must focus on. Just don't spend too much time dwelling on the past or dreaming of the future. Learn from the past, plan for the future, but live for today.
And so, when I discuss the past, I always end with 'no regrets', and I adhere to that piece of advice. What ever has happened in my life, be it good or bad, has brought me to where I am now, with whom I am with and the way we are, and it has all been proven to be worth it. My past, combined with what I do now is constantly shaping what will be my future, a second from now, a day, a week, a year. I might spend a second longer to consider the choice, but once its made, NO REGRETS. Maybe a few adjustments and a little damage control from time to time, but no regrets. And no little grey zones. I live in techicolor!
Live well my friend.
Charley's comment hit the bull's eye!
Past, Present, Future... They are as unique as the individual contemplating them. Reconciling them isn't always as easy as living them. Standing in the gray zone of wonderment attempting to put a contemplative finger on understanding isn't a bad place to be. It speaks of the compassionate and sensitive character doing the inquiring.
Judith
i just gave this old song and dance today. Almost everything you wrote about is what I talked about today. Must be something wanting me to know that I was right. Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us. Take care, TerryAnn.
Learn from your mistakes and remember your past, but don't dwell there. Each new day will eventually be a moment in your past, so live it. You can be wise and remember all the lessons you've learned AND let go of the past, as well.
Ari
"Don't look back. Something might be gaining on you."
--Satchel Paige
Words to live by. Hope all is well.
Hi Rebecca! I'm a big believer in "Yesterday ended Last Nightl" However, most truthfully, I feel that we must remember the successes and mistakes of the past, so that we can go on and live in the future. Actually, existentialists, believe in living for the moment, because that's all one really has. I would pretty well go with that, because nothing ever turns out the way that one thinks that it will. Absolutely nothing. We can use the past as a reference book, if we desire.
Thanks for your words of confidence sent to my journal. I really appreciate it. I'm over the situation now because that situation is in the past. I do enjoy your journal!! Love, Nancy
Post a Comment