Click your heels 3 times

       Click your heels together three times, and chant, "I want to be home, I want to be home" oh all right, pack up, throw everything into said car without precision, without organized regard and start driving. This elicits an "I want to be home NOW" feeling and you just hope the friendly cops you might run across, understand that pushing the speed limit is in order! I didn't run into any cops, I arrived home at a ghastly hour, but I'm here, dead sunburnt plants and all.

Inhale deeply, exhale deeply, repeat as necessary today.
Reality is at hand.

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       Now that my time, my freedom, has passed. Someone like me, feels the need to reflect back on what I've achieved, what I garnered, what I learned. Purpose of sorts, without any special need or understanding required. There are feelings I experienced that even I wouldn't be able to place words too. There were times when I felt like I was on top of the world, that not another person could be feeling as wonderful as I was feeling at the exact moment. There were also times I felt sunk as low as a person would ever want to go.

       I think when you remove yourself from familiar, and step into a world that isn't bound by time, or responsibility, you can certainly warp things inside your mind. To the mind, it stands in the here and now. Although I knew the time would come to an end, quickly and without mercy, the days before were something to settle nice and comfy into, relishing every minute like there would be no tomorrow.

       There were times, when things felt so perfect, that the annoying voice inside my head would attempt a gentle reminder, reminding me that this was temporary, but all in all, I did a fairly good job of ignoring it. Thats where the warp of mind comes in. Tricking yourself into ignoring the reality, can be a tough maze to remove yourself from. I didn't want to leave my maze. I didn't want it to end, and yet, with the twist of an alarm clock, it did. Hence, sinking to the bottom without my waterproof bulkheads.

       But I'm a perpetual swimmer, usually against the current, but swimming nonetheless. I came up for air and began the ornate mission of extracting myself from the maze I had willingly and tenaciously walked into.

       The last few days of my trip gave me more time to think, then a person should probably have on their hands. Too much thinking has a way of creating desperate conclusions and wishes in one's mind. A person can look at a beautiful mountains, fish, marvel at a gorgeous river only so long before thoughts turn to your life, love, purpose, choices, and consequences. Without daily distractions, thoughts shine a crystal clarity that even frightens a wee explorer like myself. All the would haves, should haves, could haves, still cans, times still on your side theories, should, could and cans come wildly into play.

       I think the trick now, will be holding onto the strength those powerful thoughts have created within me. I know through experience, time can be the hand that diminishes conviction, or strengthens it. From my perspective, I wish to hold onto the later part of that sentence and use it to my advantage.

       The time away was priceless, I'd do it all again in a heartbeat. I recommend a sabbatical like the one I have taken to every and anyone. You savor the wonderful, clutch the time, learn from the silence and discover portions of yourself you've learned to ignore.

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I have a zillion alerts to catch up on.
I have many emails to reply too.
I'll be by to visit everyone as soon as I can.
I just checked and it appears Paul Aurora Walking Vacation finally finished his essay while I was gone.

Take a peek at Jodi's Point & Counterpoint 

 for an interesting view on Paul and my own opinions on Spirituality.